Who Would Jesus Do?

“When a young man and a young woman give in to Satan, when they strip down like animals in the wild and prepare themselves for a lusty round of heavy petting and full-blown sex, what better reminder for them to buck up than a WWJD condom with the image of our Lord and Savior right there on the package, and then, as a fail safe measure, also on the prophylactic itself?”

[via The Revealer]

Guilty by Association

You know, I don’t think I’ll ever “get over” being a former born-again; my experiences during that period shaped me in ways that I probably don’t fully understand yet. So imagine my delight and fascination with the blog They Will Know Us By Our T-Shirts [thanks to The Morning News for the link], a blog about working in a Christian bookstore. I’d like to read every entry and add it to my RSS reader, since his comments about Passion of the Christ merchandise and Jay Jay the Jet Plane videos are insightful, honest, and funny. But beyond the humor, there’s a deep look at Christian consumerism and the evangelical subculture, touching on many issues I considered when deciding whether to leave born-againism.

This blog reminds me, in part, of a song by Steve Taylor:

So you need a new car? let your fingers take a walk
through the business guide for the “born again” flock
you’ll be keeping all your money in the kingdom now
and you’ll only drink milk from a Christian cow
don’t you go casting your bread to keep the heathen well-fed
line Christian pockets instead–avoid temptation

guilty by association

Turn the radio on to a down-home drawl
hear a brylcream prophet with a message for y’all
“I have found a new utensil in the devil’s toolbox
and the heads are gonna roll if Jesus rocks
it’s a worldly design! God’s music should be divine!
try buying records like mine–avoid temptation”

guilty by association

So you say it’s of the devil and we’ve got no choice
because you heard a revelation from the “still small voice?”
if the Bible doesn’t back it then it seems quite clear
perhaps it was the devil who whispered in your ear
It’s a Telethon Tuesday for “The Gospel Club”

“send your money in now or they’re gonna pull the plug!”
just remember this fact when they plead and beg
When The Chicken Squawks Loudest Gonna Lay A Big Egg
you could be smelling a crook
you should be checking The Book
but you’d rather listen thank look–the implication

guilty by association

Christ powerless over rice, Catholic church says

An eight-year-old celiac sufferer in New Jersey has had her First Communion revoked after the Church learned that the host used in the ceremony was made from rice flour, not wheat flour.

The girl suffers from a disorder that makes gluten consumption potentially fatal. The Church, which offers low-gluten hosts, insists on following church doctrine, which teaches that hosts must be made of wheat, in keeping with Church tradition. Even the low-gluten hosts can be harmful to some celiac sufferers, though, and the Church requires that they either drink wine instead of taking the host or abstain from Communion entirely.

Now, at the risk of sounding flippant, I have to wonder at this. The point of Holy Communion, within the Roman Catholic faith, is that the host and wine are transformed into the literal body and blood of Jesus. Why can God transform only wheat-based hosts and not rice-based hosts? Is rice somehow Christ’s Kryptonite, or is this an example of a Church sticking too stridently to tradition?